New Orleans Saints right tackle Ryan Ramczyk will miss the entire 2024 season after being placed on the reserve/physically unable to perform list on Thursday. The move was expected with Ramczyk still experiencing knee issues. It ends his season because he's a vested veteran who was placed on the list prior to final roster cuts. Ramczyk, 30, was limited to 12 games in 2023 and underwent offseason knee surgery to repair significant cartilage damage. Ramczyk said late last season he has been dealing with the cartilage issues for the past three seasons. Earlier in his career, Ramczyk was one of the top offensive linemen in the league and played 63 games over his four regular seasons. He earned first-team All-Pro honors in 2019 and was a second-team selection in both 2018 and 2020. …

No. What’re you, new? No one rises to the level of Robert Lewandowski. It’s Robert Goddamn Lewandowski. Dude just scored 40 goals in one league season, which is utterly insane. That’s after he scored 34 last year. Seventy-four motherfucking goals in two seasons in just the Bundesliga. That’s four seasons-worth to most forwards. Lewandowski is just a celestial being, the best striker in the world right now, and any team would struggle to have other players approach his level. That said, the only thing missing from Lewandowski’s career is a definitive international performance. We thought we were on the cusp of something in Euro 2016, where Poland managed to get to the quarters. On the way they drew Germany, and got a soft draw in the group with Ukraine and Northern Ireland, the …

Clinton Portis was back yesterday with yet another fractured segment of his personality, this one somewhat sweeter than the past ones, literally even. We proudly introduce "Bro Sweets," Clinton's most recent tortured mental sliver. This one had a little something extra: Redskins kick returner Antonio Brown, who actually hid under Portis' coat and did the old improv trick of acting like Bro Sweets' arms. (He was hawking jewelry and, in a charming touch, actual candy.) We did not realize that being a special teamer for the Redskins called upon such a wide variety of skills, but we support the notion nevertheless. Remember: The more the Redskins win, the more fun Portis has with this whole thing. They play The Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals this week; e…

Attention Jeff George: If your son's Pee Wee football league needs referees this weekend, we know some guys who are available. After a wildly entertaining, somewhat comical ending that kind of reminded us of the final scenes in Caddyshack, the Pac-10 wound up suspending the officiating crew that mucked up the last minutes of the Oregon-Oklahoma game on Saturday. Balls were tipped, onside kicks erroneously awarded … look, mistakes were made, OK? But the suspensions (for one game) and an apology from the Pac-10 did not mollify Sooners coach Bob Stoops, whose team lost 34-33: I've made a million mistakes. I'll make a million more in each game, and in that game included, I wish there were things I could have done differently or changed. Unlike officials, players and coach…

Probably. The video, shot in Croatia on Saturday night, purports to be footage of soccer legend-cum-legendary shitshow Diego Maradona engaging in a street fight. It was reported that the Argentine was in a Dubrovnik nightclub getting it in that night. And though the YouTube is blurry, you can make out a very Maradona-like figure when he steps into the light, and a voice that rings out pretty clearly to those familiar with his past exploits. The calls of "Diego! Diego!" also lend some evidence. And I mean…this is Diego Maradona we're talking about. This is what he does. [ 101 Great Goals/ CroatiaWeek] …

Let there be no questioning the brilliant legal mind of Jerry Sandusky's lead attorney. "He was both Gallagher His go-to legal maneuver was throwing shit against the wall. Gag order? What gag order? Just, you know, give him some more time. You'll see. His client was too busy being a swell guy to have done all that stuff everyone knows he did. This man was just born to be on television. He could really throw a party. "Somebody cute?" All My Children Check out his license plate. His co-counsel is totally more fun. There a problem? Just dial 1-800-REALITY. What about Lawyerin' Joe for the Deadspin Hall of Fame? You make the call. Polls close at 11:59 p.m. (EST) Sunday night. He needs 75 percent of the vote to make the cut. Other nominees:
Fat C…

Time to check in with Elvis Andrus and Adrian Beltre, the greatest comedic duo in sports. In the sixth inning of last night’s game against the Astros, Andrus ripped a ball down the left-field line that looked to be headed over the fence. Andrus, who has a career .348 slugging percentage, was feeling himself a little bit and broke into a home-run trot. He had to scramble into second when the ball hit the top of the wall, and that earned him a death stare from Beltre upon returning to the dugout: It’s fun to play sports with your buddies. h/t Lane …

data-mm-id=”_3e57u43xk”>As one of the foremost draft experts in media, when Mel Kiper Jr. speaks, we all tend to listen. That is why you find yourself here, wanting to hear his explanation of why Oklahoma's Jalen Hurts will not be selected anywhere near the first round come April 2020. Kiper not only said Hurts wouldn't be a first-rounder, he's projecting him to land somewhere in the fourth or fifth-round as an unfinished quarterback who will need a lot of work to become NFL-ready. He cites Lincoln Riley, QB whisperer, as the central reason for Hurts' success, although Kiper noted Hurts has made significant strides over the last few years as a whole. This is obviously quite interesting because Hurts is at or near the top of the Heisman leaderboard, depending on who …

data-mm-id=”_w2fes8kaz”>Despite trading away any and all talent they had on the roster, the Miami Dolphins didn't end up with the first overall pick in the 2020 NFL Draft. Instead, they found themselves at No. 5, but fortunately for them, still ended up with what they hope is their quarterback of the future in Tua Tagovailoa. While their efforts to land the Alabama star didn't lack the usual dose of NFL subterfuge, it also came from a bit of luck after Tagovailoa's injury suffered in November raised enough medical red flags for him to drop. The development may have worked out fortuitously for Miami, but now that he's on the roster, they have to confront the very-real problems that Tagovailoa's injury history represents. If anything can be said about Miami'…

data-mm-id=”_flprw4lc4″>If there's one lesson Major League Baseball has emphasized over the last few decades, it's that cheaters prosper. But while the steroid era and lack of accountability was bad enough, the latest cheating scandal proves that all MLB teams should cheat. Because guess what? You're gonna get away with it. The MLB just handed down a slap-on-the-wrist penalty to the Boston Red Sox for their cheating ways during the 2018 season. You know, the year where they won 108 games and the World Series. Well, for their actions, they'll be STRIPPED of a second-round draft pick (LOL), a replay operator has been suspended for a year (can someone say scapegoat?) and 2018 manager Alex Cora was suspended for 2020 because of his involvement in the Astros cheating sca…